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“Are you as tired of this as I am?”

October 4, 2007

OK, so its 9:30pm and technically past my bedtime. I’m exhausted but I can’t quite justify sleep until I get a chance to at least skim the subjects for tomorrow. Yes, I am still going to get up at 4:30 to really tackle it, but its easier, esp with my brain still half asleep, to just recall and add on to current knowledge than try to learn it all in one gulp.

I’m learning my lesson from FP and I’m going to try to do better about writing my “adventures” at least every other day. After pulling a 16 hr day, I’m lucky to remember what happened this morning.

Anyhoo, yesterday went a bit better than the day previous. I had read about the CABG procedure we were planning to do, and also the anesthesia textbook (not just the “secrets”) on my assigned subjects of discussion. This amounted to me only sounding like an idiot about half the time. I’m serious, this is so hard for me. I haven’t had surgery or cardiology yet, and I was always terrible at physics and pharm…and it feels like all 4 combined!!

Plus I really have no read on this guy. I haven’t decided if he thinks I’m the proper amount of stupid. I’m so up & down with him.

I’ll describe perfectly how you intubate someone
…then try one, only to end up dicking around with it for 10 min as they desat down to 65, where he will then angrily take over
…only to have him see how it was in fact a very difficult airway

Or we’ll start talking about my assigned reading, and I know everything it says
…but then he’ll ask me about something like “why?” and I’m thinking it didn’t say why! So I look like I didn’t actually study, or in some cases, learn anything in medschool, as I stammer, stare blankly, or blurt out the total opposite of the answer (the latter being the most frequent outcome, like when I forgot when you would give atropine…it speeds the heart, right?! Ack.)
…And then it turns out, no one knows why! Or I had it right with my first guess. Or it’s something he wants me to read more about.

So in the end, I think I am technically ahead.

I think.

Today was a bit of a different animal than the rest of the week. I got to be lost in a new hospital, this time seeing several short cases instead of one or two 5-10 hr major operations. I started the day with my first ever lap surgery (gallbladder)! My doc was done until the afternoon, so rather than, say, NAP!…I was placed with another doc. And this was the turnaround for me.

This guy had a totally different teaching style, VERY hands-on. Quite literally see one, do one. Plus I was able to see a few different complications like a patient vomiting after intubation (no aspiration, no worries). It was the first time the anesthesia was more interesting than the actual surgery (only varicose vein repair).

After lunch I hooked back up with my doc, and upon hearing my experience with “the other man,” started trusting me a little more, I think, and let me do a bit more. It was all up from there. I saw my first neurosurgery, got complimented on my case presentation on The Patient of 1000 Co-Morbids, and was able to able to answer all my pimping on muscle relaxants. I of course balanced it out by forgetting something totally basic like THE DIFF BETWEEN SYMPATHETIC & PARASYMPATHETIC.

Aaaah!! Why do I do this to myself?

Speaking of which, I’m headed to bed. I need to be fresh for….babies!

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