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Day 21: My attempt at a happy post!

May 20, 2007

Ok, so I woke up feeling pretty rant-tastic about the absolutely perfect timing of my wisdom teeth demanding to be removed THE VERY DAY I SHOULD START STUDYING BOARDS…but thats a bad way to start the day. Instead, I shall look at the positives of this…

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1) YAY! 7th Quarter is done! (And we celebrate with a bunny woot!)

2) I have invented a new diet called the “My mouth fucking hurts!” Diet. Y’see, all you do is set up a way for it to be painful to open your mouth wider than half an inch and/or chew anything. There’s no counting calories, no special foods, just eat whatever you can fit in there and get down without screaming. Its just that simple! Note: I do plan on getting this looked at this week and I’ll get surgery before boards if I must, but otherwise I promise to get it done before rotations.

3) Columbia with the girls was a blast. We dressed up like girls. We had real food. We went dancing at Deja Vu. Sorry, not the strip club. We discovered townies are the same everywhere. We gave a bachelor some marriage advice ala Dane Cook (“You gotta fucking cheat!”). The clubs unfortunately closed earlier than we thought, so we headed back to the room. Not before being courted on the street by some drunk frat boys (“You ladies are too beautiful to go!”) We got goofy at a Walgreens. And indecisive at a ghetto liquor store. Then we finished the night with 6 rounds of Morgan’s & Coke, a saucy game of “I Never…”, and inappropriate drunken fondling of Katie. Just kidding! It was quite appropriate. Pictures to come!

4) So far so good on the happy pills. No side effects like somnolence, nausea or erectile dysfunction yet. I did just read I should use caution while taking NSAIDs due to increased risk of bleeding. Think this could be a problem with the 8 aspirin I’m taking a day for the wisdom teeth? Well, I’m already on birth control, a little overweight, and physically inactive, I’ll just start smoking to balance it out. For the non-medico peeps- those factors would have me clotting too much in a “hypercoaguable state”, and I could get complications like a DVT.

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5) While writing this, I finished a cup of yogurt without screaming.
Great success!

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