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Day 19: Go crazy? Don’t mind if I do!

May 18, 2007

I don’t typically show this side of me, being a normally laid-back Type B and all, but I have to admit… I AM STRESSIN’ THE FUCK OUT!

What am I stressing out about exactly? Thanks for asking, some readers but mostly voices in my head! I’ll tell you…its simple math really…BOARDS + Anything else that takes up time= STRESS.

Things taking up time-
1) Planning to move to Denver…OK, remember my whole, which option to choose discussion I had? Well, a house/townhome to rent is what we are going with, but now we have to pick out which neighborhood. And what features we cannot skimp on. And how much we can “afford.” And then when to check it out.

Sweet Jesus that last one is 90% of the stress. The options are go one month before we have to move, but thats in prime boards time. The other is after boards, which leaves us 2 wks before, and thus less options and less time to correct any fuck-ups. Either way still freaks me out b/c we have just that one shot to Denver. Thats 24 hours of driving wasted if nothing works out. Ah pressure! I wish I had a friend out there who could be doing this for me.

2) Wisdom teeth…ow they hurt! But the cost! And the time spent drugged up and not studying for boards! But then again, how great am I gonna study if they are hurting all the time? Damn you wisdom teeth, you’ve been coming in since I was 18, why the pain now?!

3) Medstudent-itis… Thom the counselor wants me to go get a depression screening done. I am out of allergy meds, not that they were really cuttin’ it. I think my thyroid is sluggish. My throat hurts when I swallow. I only have one contact left and my glasses need updating. Women who might have BRCA should be tested by 25 so they can start thinking about kids, mammograms, prophylactic mastectomy, etc…just to name a few things bothering me.

I am going to take the time to appease a few of these today by visiting Dr. Tettambel (an awesome lady plus an AAO fellow!) and then get back with Thom tomorrow. Hopefully I can cross some of this shiz-nit of my liz-nist.

4) Being poor…don’t get me wrong, we can afford to live comfortably. BUT if the docs decide on need to be on anything or get any tests, its going to be a bit of a strain to throw that in the budget. The budget has been restrained to the last dollar so that we can save money for the move. We have no idea on the incidentals of that and we’d rather not be caught off guard and thrown into more debt.

I swear to God if people really realized how long us doctors were dirt poor with crappy healthcare, how many sacrifices we made in regards to family & our health, and how utterly frustrated we were with medical care and education…no one would ever think we do this for the money.

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