I’m not doing so good today. I’ve had an impending sense of doom all weekend. I’ve managed to get all of geriatrics done plus a few hem/onc lectures, but every single one has been a struggle. I intersperse them with clips of various movies or tv shows from my favorite website (no I’m not telling…well maybe if you ask nicely or bring me a cookie), just so I can get through them. I wish I smoked. That sounds terrible but moments like this I can see the appeal…something to settle my nerves. I don’t know if its any one big thing concerning me, several overwhelming me, or the premonition of things to come…but I can’t shake this feeling.
Thoughts that have been troubling me:
1) I read an article that said women with the BRCA gene need to get their breasts removed by age 25. I’ll be 24 in a little over a month. I once considered getting the test done, but decided it would just worry me and raise my insurance rates. Now I’m wondering how much it would cost out-of-pocket…
2) I am halfway through getting caught up on Principles. BUT I still got the other half, plus path and surgery.
3) Paid off credit but still waiting on the balance transfer. Right now there’s $70 in the account. Thats b/c we went way over our budget this month by like $300. Good thing Josh gets paid in 2 days.
4) BOARDS. That could definitely qualify as a looming presence.
5) I think I might have failed the peds midterm.
6) Why are people so cranky lately? We used to at least be polite to each other. I could walk down the hall and say hey and get a smile back. Lately I’ve been getting a “look the other way, pretend I didn’t see you,” or even a snarky look. What’s’ up with that? Even some of my close friends I’ve been getting a weird vibe from. Maybe its just me…
7) Things are going a little too good at home. I am sad to say that I am such a Bitter Betty that that kind of thing makes me nervous.
8) My sleep schedule is so fucked and my workouts have been non-existent for quite awhile. I’m eating alright but it gets confusing for planning meals when the first meal of the day is around 1pm and you go to bed around 4am. This could be a big issue. I’m all discombobulated.
I know what you’re thinking…Michelle, you are just looking at all the negatives, no wonder you are blue! Always look on the brighter side of life…doo doo…doo doo…da doo da doo da doo
Uh…I’ll get right on that 😛